Myself and I

What would I say to my younger self if I could ? Damn, so much. But, I would start with telling her to take time to understand a true face of a person she will put her trust in. There are people who don't even deserve her trust and time. To speak up for herself when she’s feeling uncomfortable in a situation, and to hold her middle finger up to whoever doesn’t like it. To not enter in any relationships with boys until she builds a solid and secure relationship with herself first. To spend more time with her girls — having fun, being young rather than rushing to grow up so quickly. That her wild and messy curls are beautiful just the way they are - and if the only way she’s gonna “fit in” is to straighten them all the time, then she doesn’t need to fucking fit anywhere.  

I will tell her : babygirl, surround yourself with positive people - people who recognize your strengths, and applaud you for them. And If I have an advice : stop saying you can’t do something. Stop the negative self-talk and abusing your body. I don’t drink alcohol, don’t smoke but when it’s comes to having fun, no worries I know how to turn up without giving any shit to my body. Stop being stressed about things you have no control over. Rise up from where you’ve been, scrub away the tears and the pain of yesterday, then start again. Girl, WASH your face !

Don’t compare yourself to other people because it will only bring out the worst in you. You may become envious of other people’s lives, and in contrary, you may become judgmental of others. Your journey is different from everyone else’s. Just focus on yourself and what you can do to reach your goals and dreams. Remember, everyone is at different stages in life – you may just be starting out while someone else might have already put in all the work. Just set your own space and enjoy the ride. Be supportive and happy for other people’s success instead. You’re going to want that when it’s your turn. You can rise up from anything. Nothing in this crazy life is permanent. You’re not stuck. You have choices. You can learn something new. You can create habits. All that matters is that you decide today and never look back. Don’t let this world make you bitter. Don’t let the action of other people turn you cold on the inside. Certain things happen that hurt us, people come then leave us. Don’t let those things make you unkind. It’s okay to be sad. But it’s never okay to do other people wrong just because you were done wrong. We’re human and we make mistakes. But don’t let pain and sadness ruin your lives. Wake up in the morning and do what you think is right. It’s all about taking whatever life throws at you and learning from it. Be alone and independent. It’s a skill few master. Don’t wait for someone to love you ; love yourself first.

You can't be both your #1 and your #1 enemy. We're hard on ourselves. Many of us are more understanding and forgiving with others than we are with ourselves. It doesn't make sense because if anyone is going to be on your side, it should be you.

If I have learned anything over the last few years, it’s that you have to always be ready to face certain battles alone. One day you’re on cloud nine and the next day you’re hitting rock bottom. One day your phone lights up with the exact words you want to hear and the next day you’re receiving the news you’ve been fearing. One day you’re planning the future with someone and the next day you’re packing your bags and leaving. Sometimes we just want life to slow down, stop battling and start living. I guess what keeps me going is knowing that we all get what we deserve in the end, what we’ve worked so hard for and what our hearts truly desire. As long as you still know how to stand tall every time life knocks you down, you will prevail.

It’s time for me to let myself be happy, to let go everything and everyone that does not support my growth. Time to replace damaging thoughts with healing ones. To embrace my own evolution. Happiness isn’t selective. Happiness belongs to every single person that claims they are worthy of it, that they deserve it. Ironically, life becomes easier when you know that even if you lose all your battles, if you haven’t lost yourself, you’re still a winner.

"Imagine if you loved yourself in the same way you loved another person; not caring about the flaws in the body or inside the mind, seeing the virtues even bigger, supporting, taking care. That would be a new level of self-esteem, and another way to be indestructible."

Love.